Earlier today as I consumed my daily caloric intake in mint oreos alone, I had a most fantastic epiphany. I'm almost certain that God has bestowed upon mankind the gift of mint oreos in order to provide a small glimpse of what we have to look forward to in heaven. The Bible speaks of heaven being a place of indescribable beauty- streets paved with gold, countless diamonds, rubies, and emeralds. Not even our wildest dreams do heaven justice. And although all of this sounds incredible, it occurred to me that having the streets paved with mint oreos would be a much more enjoyable experience for me. While gold is a valuable metal and boasts a lustrous shine, it's sole purpose in heaven would be purely aesthetic. Mint oreos, on the other hand, offer much more than aesthetic value. Not only do they resemble the streets with which we are familiar, but they are also incredibly tasty. I mean, can you imagine being able to walk down the street and take a bite out of the chocolaty asphalt whenever you feel compelled to do so? The mint frosting sandwiched between the two cookies would provide a vibrant alternative to emeralds, and could be used in lieu of grass, trees, and shrubbery. The clouds would likely be consistent with the taste, consistency and appearance of freshly-spun cotton candy, and the tree trunks could be composed of kit-kat bars. Anyway, I think you get my point. If heaven could be like Willie Wanka's Chocolate Factory, I'm pretty sure I'd be in heaven (both literally and figuratively speaking).
*The views expressed are based on my own opinions/desires, and are in no way representative of the Biblical description of heaven.
**This fantasy of an edible heaven is based on the assumption that calories will be nonexistent, and therefore will not contribute to the size of my thighs.
