More Than Fruitcake and Holiday Cards

 Hi friends, it's time for another blog! The issue on my mind: political correctness, specifically in reference to the time of year that falls between December 1 and January 1. No, I'm not talking about winter. It may interest you to know that winter doesn't technically begin until December 21, which means it's only been official for four days. What I'm talking about is what is now referred to as the "Holiday Season." The season that used to be a peaceful preparation for Christmas. The season that the church calls Advent, "arrival" or "coming." The season that now consists of corporate marketing campaigns and commercial upon commercial attempting to convince us of all the material objects that we need in our lives. And worst of all, the season that has been tainted by political correctness and generic greeting cards.

In preparation for Christmas, I went to several stores looking for Christmas cards, but they're more difficult to find than you might think. Holiday greeting cards fill the aisles instead. "Happy Holidays" is now the accepted wish to family, friends and colleagues. This phrase is safe, it's generic, and it's boring. I understand the reasoning behind wanting to be all-inclusive and not daring to offend, but in our attempt to be neutral, we are removing the very reason that this season exists.

You see, Christmas means more to me than presents and fruitcake. Christmas is a time to celebrate the birth of Jesus. Christmas is a time when the angels and shepherds worshiped the baby in the manger- a time when we can still revel in the mystery and miracle of his incarnation. And Christmas is a tradition, a tradition which has been warped and is slowly being stripped away, replaced by secular culture and practices and rhetoric. I respect other beliefs and religions and recognize that not everyone celebrates Christmas, but I also expect that same respect from others. So I'm going to celebrate Christmas and continue to call it that, and I refuse to become a generic greeting card that wishes everyone a nondescript "Happy Holidays." And if this offends you, deal with it. I'm not Jewish, but if you wished me a "Happy Hanukkah," I would say "thanks" and be on my merry way. So Merry Christmas, Merry Christmas, Merry Christmas!     

You Know You Grew Up In A Pastor's Family When...

Let me preface this list by giving a bit of background for those of you who aren't as familiar with my childhood.

My dad is a pastor. A missionary pastor. I lived in Nigeria for the first 6 years of my life. We lived in a cement brick house with cement floors and relied on solar panels for light and our well for water. Television? What's that? I played in the dirt with the native village kids.

After Nigeria, we moved to Indiana, where my dad finished up his seminary program. We were poor. Television? Oh, it existed. In a 12" x 12" box. Excellent!

Following our 2-year stay in Indiana, we moved to the LA area, where my dad started a church and worked primarily with Muslims and Gypsies. If you think Gypsies only exist in the movies, you're wrong. Our church met on Saturday evenings. Since this was a special assignment for my dad, he had to raise his own support. This meant that nearly every Sunday, he traveled around to different churches in the area and throughout the state to preach and talk about his ministry. We got to travel with him every time.

My mom... well she's a missionary too. And a musician. She plays guitar and piano and writes her own songs. Lots of them. So guess what! In addition to being given the opportunity to travel, we were also guilted (I mean given) the opportunity to pursue our musical talents. We were the modern day Von Trapp Family Singers (Sound of Music in case you're lost). People literally called us that. With six people in our family, there were lots of opportunities to harmonize. We even had matching Easter outfits made one year. Laughing yet?

Needless to say, I was often forced against my will to participate in the family ministry. This was how my parents put food on the table, and I certainly wasn't about to give up food. Oh, and about that TV... Well, we finally upgraded from a 12" to a 20" (still no cable), and after a few years of that, we convinced our parents to buckle down and get a 32" AND cable. Glory Hallelujah!

So, now that you have a better understanding of my childhood, it might make my list more enjoyable. You  know you grew up in a pastor's family when:

• You weren't allowed to watch PG-13 movies until you went away to college.
• At least twice a year, one of the family activities involved creating, folding, stuffing, sealing and stamping family ministry newsletters.
• Your mother referenced all-beef hot dogs as being "gourmet."
• You prayed as a family at least 3 times per day. 
• There were communion wafers in the very back of the highest kitchen cupboard, and as a kid, you begged your parents to let you try them.
• Buying clothes was always a nightmare. They were either too short, too tight or too low. Turtlenecks were favored.
• You got to stay late and clean up after all church-related functions.
• You went to church twice most Sundays... sometime three times if you were lucky. 
• You learned to be really good at sleeping with your eyes open.
• "Butt" and "crap" were always unacceptable words.
• When many of your friends found out that you were a PK (pastor's kid), they treated you differently because of your "holy-by-association" privilege (just for the record, I totally don't believe in that).
• Dating? Don't even think about it until you're 15. You can double date then. But you're not allowed to go on a regular date until you're 18. Fortunately (or unfortunately, however you choose to look at it), this was never an issue for me.
• Your family got lots of cards and presents from the congregation at Christmas. This was always a perk. 
• You can recite the Apostle's Creed, Nicene Creed and the Liturgy by heart, and know most of the hymns by heart too.
• Your mom's advice to you is always "just pray about it."
• Neither of your parents have ever had more than one drink at a time. Alcoholic intake is strongly discouraged. 
• You still get to sit through morning devotions out of the "Portals of Prayer" devotion booklet when you visit home.

The list can go on and on, but I think I got my point across. Did you crack a smile while reading this? I found myself laughing out loud a couple times as I reminisced about all of the ridiculous things that I experienced growing up. I hated most of them as they were happening to me, but looking back at my childhood now, I really wouldn't change much of anything. Ok, well maybe the turtlenecks and multiple church services on a Sunday. But this was my childhood. This is my family. These are my memories- the things that make us unique. And I have the utmost respect for both of my parents for what they do.

The family at Rachael's confirmation.

Most Recent Art Obsession: Trees

These ceramic plaques started their lives as kitchen decor. One of them featured tomatoes; the other peas. Definitely not the style of decor I'm going for in the house. But I saw their potential, and more importantly, saw the fact that they were 90% off at Jo Ann Fabrics. Clearance is one of my weaknesses. But for less than a buck a pop, I figured they were worth the investment, even if they didn't end up working out.

I'm not the kind of artist that can imagine something up in my mind and transfer the idea onto paper. I need a visual representation of an idea, which I can then attempt to replicate. So like most of my other artwork, these are not entire my own creations. I found 2 pictures online that I really liked and copied them. However, I did add my own flare, so I suppose that makes them "mine."

I started with this one, which definitely ended up being the most difficult and time consuming. I decided to repaint the background, since I didn't like how it first turned out. The challenge was figuring out how to smoothly transition from color to color, without blending them together too much. This picture is called "Hopeful Winter."

This picture ended up being significantly different from the one I found online, mostly because I wasn't able to replicate the stroke technique. The background colors are also a variation from the original. Since this is a different painting style than the first, it ended up taking less than half the time the first one took. I call this "Spring Showers."

I used acrylic paint on both of these. The total cost of this project ended up being about $3.

They are now hanging in my dining room.

Cultivate Your Curves

This past Christmas, one of my friends gave me a calendar containing quotes from a variety of women who lived last century. Most of the quotes are witty, and I have found that I identify with a number of them. One of my favorites is by Mae West, who says:

"Cultivate your curves. They may be dangerous, but they won't be avoided."

Out of 11 fabulous quotes that I've flipped through so far this past year, this one stood out to me, in particular, because curves are something that I deal with on a daily basis.

*Gasp!!* Not curves!! Yep, it's true. I'm openly admitting to the fact that I don't have a size 0 waste. Nor do I have long, slender legs. I'm 5'2".

I think it's interesting, funny and tragic (all at the same time) that weight and body image are such sensitive, yet obtrusively publicized topics in our culture. Don't ever ask a girl how much she weighs. Don't ever mentioned that she's gained a few pounds. And don't EVER comment on the size of her ass, if you know what's good for you. Each of these "rules" illustrates the negative connotation that is associated with weight (that is, weighing more than the absolute minimum required for survival). But why is body image perceived in this way? What has influenced our perception of what is physically ideal?

What I find most interesting is the fact that the "ideal" body image/size/shape is constructed, not by society, by the average Joe, by working moms or waitresses (although Hooters girls might play a role), but by the media. By Hollywood. By Vogue magazine. By individuals sitting in their corner offices on the 37th floor of skyscraper buildings in New York City and Milan creating the newest model of physical "perfection"- a model that is unattainable by most, and undesirable by many, yet is accepted as truth and beauty and is placed on a pedestal for those of us living in reality to constantly aspire to become (more often than not, unsuccessfully). 

This ideal image has evolved over time. If you look throughout history, what was desirable in a woman was strength- both in character and in muscle mass. Oh, and having meat on her bones. Men wanted meat (to put it crudely), because meat was representative of health and wealth and fertility. Flashback to the Renaissance period and take a look at some of the art. Women are portrayed with larger hips and smaller tops. This is what men wanted. But isn't this the opposite of what's considered attractive today? Think about it.


 Granted, there are subcultures that are into curves. I'm thinking specifically of the Latino and Black cultures, which are not only ok
with meat on the bones, but glorify it like Renaissance men did. And I've talked to my fair share of guys from a variety of cultures who are into curves. I think that in some ways, these subcultures are growing and are gaining attention, but I would argue that mainstream media still governs our perception of beauty: tiny waste, long, slender legs, small hips and big boobs.

Sounds like the spitting image of Barbie to me. Did you know that if Barbie materialized into a human being, she would be 6 feet tall, weigh 100 lbs and most likely need multiple back surgeries due to her overly ample bosom? Oh, and her body to fat ratio would be insufficient for her to menstruate. Skinny but infertile. It's a trade off, I suppose.

Perhaps I was partially motivated to write this because of my un-barbie-like features, but I truly think it's tragic how many girls and women suffer from horrible self-image, simply because they don't look like the models on Project Runway. I'm certainly not advocating an unhealthy diet, and being overweight is a serious issue that our country is dealing with. But don't buy into the lie that you're only beautiful if you meet the Hollywood "criteria." I think Marilyn Monroe looks unbelievably sexy in the picture above, and her thighs are thick. So feel sexy in your skin, and if that means 36-34-42, then good for you!

(Interesting article on Barbie if you want to check it out.)
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/uk_news/magazine/7920962.stm

Fun Fall Recipes: Pumpkin Cinnamon Rolls

My latest culinary experiment was pumpkin cinnamon rolls. I love cinnamon rolls, and I love pumpkin, so I figured this would be the perfect combination. I researched a couple recipes online, found one that I liked (http://www.goodlifeeats.com/2010/09/pumpkin-cinnamon-rolls.html), and used it as the basis for my recipe. However, I changed things up a bit and added my own flavor. The directions are pretty much the same as the above recipe. Here's what I came up with:

Dough:
1/4 cup warm water (about 110 degrees, not too hot)
2 1/4 teaspoons active dry yeast
1/3 cup warm milk
1 large egg, beaten
3/4 cup canned pumpkin
2 tablespoons melted butter
2 cups (approximately) all-purpose flour
1 1 /4 cup whole wheat flour
1/8 cup sugar
1/8 cup brown sugar
3/4 teaspoon salt
3/4 teaspoon cinnamon
1/4 teaspoon nutmeg
1/4 teaspoon cloves

Filling:
3/4-1 stick butter (depending on how much you want)
5 T sugar
1 T brown sugar
2 teaspoons cinnamon
1/4 t nutmeg
1/4 t cloves

Cream Cheese Frosting:
4 ounces cream cheese
1/2 stick (4 ounces) butter, softened
3/4 teaspoon fresh lemon juice
1 1/2-2 cups powdered sugar

Directions:




In a large bowl, stir the yeast into the warm water to soften. Make sure the yeast dissolves. Add milk, egg, pumpkin, butter, sugar, brown sugar, salt, cinnamon, nutmeg and cloves to the mixture. After stirring, add 1 1/4 cups whole wheat flour gradually. Stir for 1-2 minutes.

Gradually add the all-purpose flour, a little at a time, until the dough is stiff enough to knead. Start with about 1 1/2 cups and increase if necessary. Place the dough onto a floured surface. Knead, adding flour as necessary, until you have a smooth, elastic dough. (I didn't need to use the full 2 cups).

Put the dough into a greased bowl. Flip it over to cover the entire ball of dough with oil. Cover the bowl with a towel and let the dough rise for about an hour. The dough should double in size. (I had to let mine rise for longer than an hour).

Combine the white sugar, brown sugar, cinnamon, nutmeg and cloves in a small bowl and set aside.

Transfer the risen dough to a lightly greased work surface (counter top or table is best) and roll it into a 16" x 12" rectangle (you don't have to be too precise about size).



Spread softened butter over the dough and then sprinkle with the sugar mixture.

Roll the dough into a log the long way and slice into rolls using a sharp knife. It helps if you rinse the knife in warm water in between slices. Place the slices in a greased 9x13 inch baking pan (or in two 8 or 9 inch round cake or pie pans). Cover the rolls with a towel and let them rise for about 45 minutes (they should be almost doubled in size).


Bake the rolls in a preheated oven at 375°F until they're brown around the edges and beginning to turn golden brown across the center (about 20-30 minutes, depending on the size of the rolls).

While rolls bake, you can prepare the cream cheese frosting. Place the cream cheese and butter in a medium-sized bowl and warm in the microwave so they are soft. Add the vanilla and lemon juice and cream with a mixer. Add the powdered sugar gradually and blend until the frosting is at a desired consistency.

Once the rolls our done, take them out of the oven. While they're still warm, frost them with the cream cheese frosting. Serve while warm.

Bon appetit!

Moving from Rhetoric to Action

I recently attended a women's conference called "Heritage and Hope: Women's Education in a Global Context." This conference was hosted in celebration of Bryn Mawr College's 125th anniversary as an all-girl's university. As I'm sure you can deduce from the title, the conference theme was centered on girl's/women's education, both domestically and abroad, and at both the institutional and grassroots levels.

I went to this conference primarily for business networking purposes, although I'm also deeply passionate about and interested in economic development, of which women's education plays a vital role. The majority of the conference revolved around the specific issue of women's higher education at an institutional level, and what educational institutions here the the US and throughout the "developed" world can do to partner with educational institutions internationally to promote women's education. While I think this is an important topic to address, I was far more interested in what educational institutions (and individuals) here in the US can do to promote girl's education at the grassroots level, particularly in rural communities in so-called "underdeveloped" countries.

The line up of conference speakers was impressive, the most notable (in my mind) being Mr. Nicholas Kristof, New York Times editor, co-author of Half the Sky, advocate of women's human rights and proud feminist. All of the panel discussions and breakout sessions that I participated in were extremely interesting and touched on various aspects of the overall theme of women's education. Everyone seemed to have the same goal in mind: empowering women through education. And everyone had brilliant ideas about how to make that happen. We brainstormed, we challenged each other, we discussed different theories.

As the conference came to an end, I'd say the general feeling was one of satisfaction and accomplishment. We (or they, as in Bryn Mawr College) had done it. They had orchestrated and executed this conference to perfection. And we had successfully dialogued about a wide array of issues revolving around women's education and how to promote it internationally. Great. I mean, it really was great! This is such an important and relevant topic, and we had tackled it. But at the end of the day, what had we REALLY accomplished? So what if we debated different development theories? So what if we speculated as to which educational institution was capable of affecting the most positive change. At the end of the day, it was all rhetoric. Just rhetoric.

Certainly, the conference leaders stressed the importance of moving forward, taking the "progress" we had made and turning it into action. But once the conference was over and the feelings of camaraderie and collaboration had inevitably dissipated, I found it difficult to take that next step in a positive direction. So this is me admitting to my frustration, both in myself and in others, for failing to move beyond rhetoric and into action. Granted, it's not an easy process, but it is a necessary one.

I have much more to write on this topic, but I'll save it for part 2.

Fun Fall Recipes: Libby's Pumpkin Roll

One of the things that I love most about fall are the seasonal goodies. Pumpkin, in particular, is something that I can't get enough of during the fall. Pumpkin spice lattes, pumpkin bread, pumpkin rolls, pumpkin pancakes, pumpkin stuffed french toast... the list goes on and on.

Most people who know me are aware of the fact that I love to cook and bake. While I enjoy finding great recipes and trying them, what's even more fulfilling to me is finding recipes that look appetizing, but then tweaking them so that they're my own. Perhaps it's the "artist" in me that demands creativity and originality, but whatever it is, I enjoy being able to call it "mine."

The past couple of weeks, I've been busying myself in the kitchen with some fun recipes. Here's the first of many pumpkin-based treats that I think you might like:

Libby's Pumpkin Roll
Ingredients:
1/4 cup powdered sugar (for the towel)
3/4 cup all-purpose flour
1/2 t. baking soda
1/2 t. baking powder
1/2 t. ground cinnamon
1/2 t. ground cloves
1/4 t. salt
3 large eggs
1 cup granulated sugar
2/3 cup 100% pure canned pumpkin
1 cup chopped walnuts (I didn't use these)
1 (8 oz) package cream cheese, softened
1 cup powdered sugar, sifted
6 tablespoons butter
1 teaspoon vanilla
1/4 cup powdered sugar (for decoration)

Directions:
1. PREHEAT oven to 375 degrees F. Grease 15 x 10-inch jelly-roll pan (I used a regular cookie sheet); line with wax paper. Grease and flour paper. Lay out towel on counter and sprinkle with powdered sugar.

2. COMBINE flour, baking powder, baking soda, cinnamon, cloves and salt in small bowl. Beat eggs and sugar in large mixer bowl until thick. Beat in pumpkin. Stir in flour mixture. Spread evenly into prepared pan. Sprinkle with nuts (I didn't use the nuts).

3. BAKE for 13 to 15 minutes or until top of cake springs back when touched.



4. Immediately loosen and turn cake onto prepared towel (you might need help with this, since the cookie sheet is so hot). Carefully peel off paper. Roll up cake and towel together, starting with narrow end. Cool on wire rack (I didn't have a wire rack, so I just let it cool on the counter).



5. BEAT cream cheese, powdered sugar, butter and vanilla in small mixer bowl until smooth. I always add a bit of fresh lemon juice for an extra kick. Carefully unroll cake; remove towel. Spread cream cheese mixture over cake. Reroll cake. Wrap in plastic wrap and refrigerate at least one hour. Sprinkle with powdered sugar before serving, if desired.



I was thinking that this recipe was going to be a bit challenging, especially the whole "rolling" part. But it was surprising easy, and unsurprisingly delicious. I invited some friends over and made it for dessert. We finished it off that night. Highly recommended!

Bloom Where You're Planted

One of the quotes that I have heard numerous times in my life is "Bloom where you are planted." The idea behind this statement is that we should dig our roots deep and thrive wherever we are, regardless of our environment. An interesting thought, and I definitely believe that there is some merit to it. After all, a large part of our success and happiness stems from a conscious decision to make the most out of every situation and to be the best the we can be, regardless of circumstances. I do think that who we are as a person is enormously up to us to decide. However, I think that it would be dishonest and, frankly, wrong to assume that our environment does not have a significant bearing on our outcome. We do not live in a vacuum. Our lives are framed in context of the specific geography, point in history, cultural setting, etc that compose life as we know it.

This reality has been brought to my attention as of late in my search to discover who I am, who I want to be and where I want to be. Having grown up in Southern California and now living in Philadelphia, I have experienced almost polar opposite environments, particularly referencing the cultural dissimilarities. California is sunny, both literally and figuratively speaking. It is relaxed, it's open to anything, it's creative. Philadelphia, despite what FX may have you believe, is not always sunny. In fact, it is rarely sunny. It is more academic than creative, and more rigorous than relaxed. Recently, I have really begun to realize that I am a different person in California than I am in Pennsylvania. No, I don't grow a foot or assume a male persona. But I do notice a difference in my personality, the way I express myself, and even the way I feel about life.

And this brings me back to the idea that we are significantly influenced by our environment. One of the things that I've been struggling with most about being in Philadelphia, other than being physically separated from my best friends and my family, is the lack of creativity and openness. Life is so much more rigid out here. Work is more competitive. There are always people to impress. But it's so much more than that. It's the entire culture, the way people interact, the lingo. I feel less inspired when I am out here, or perhaps I'm inspired in a different kind of way.

I recently returned from a 2 1/2 week trip to California, where I had the pleasure of being in two of my best friends' weddings, as well as catching up with a lot of high school friends and some of my family. I had a wonderful time and really let loose. I partied and acted a bit crazy at times, and I enjoyed every minute of it. I guess the best part about my experience on this trip was that I was able to express a side of me that I don't usually have the opportunity to express on the east coast, or at least don't feel comfortable expressing. So it was a bit of a release for me. And I knew that no one was judging me, because they associate with this side of me. We have that connection.

The transition back to the east coast after such a long trip was especially difficult for me this time. There were a number of factors that contributed to the difficulty, but I think the hardest thing for me was letting go of west coast Anna and facing east coast reality head on. Having been back for 2 weeks now, things are back to normal, and I'm feeling pretty good about life in Philly. I'm beginning to realize that there are things here on the east coast that inspire me. They're just different things. Rather than being inspired by sandy beaches rainbow sandals and California burritos, I now find beauty in the changing colors and crisp fall days.

So perhaps my earlier argument of significant environmental and circumstantial impact on our lives is null and void. Well, not quite. I still believe that, to a certain extent, external factors play a determining role in our outcome. However, it is up to us to decide how to act on those factors- whether to let them get the best of us, or whether to make the most of them. And therein lies the beauty of "blooming where we are planted."

Working Vacation

I've heard the term "working vacation" tossed around before, and it always seemed like a pretty contradictory concept to me. I always think of vacation as an absence of work in one form or another. So whether you're vacationing from washing dishes (work) or from your daily exercise sessions (work) or from going into the office and composing dozens of emails to which you will never receive a response (work), vacation is a brief (or lengthy) hiatus from these typical routines that seem so often to dominate our lives.

So how did this idea of a working vacation come into being? I suspect that it evolved in the US of A as a way to justify professionals who decide not to be in the office for 80+ hours per week, but don't want to appear to be slackers. If you think about it, the work standards in the US (and this is generalization) are far more rigorous than in most other developed countries. Take Europe, for example. I've had the opportunity to travel throughout much of Western Europe, and one of the things that has stood out to me is the fact that Europeans work to live, rather than the other way around, which I think is a problem for so many Americans. For example, some countries (like Italy and Switzerland) close businesses for an hour at lunch to allow for nap time. Mandatory naps... that's got to be one of the greatest inventions since the wheel. Then I think of first year lawyers or doctor who are working an average of 80-90 hours per week with no end in sight. Perhaps one of the reasons for this is that they actually have that much work that needs to be accomplished. However, I'm positive that there's also an element of competition and "proving" of oneself to the boss. Oh self-imposed unattainable standards and skewed perceptions of success... whatever would we do without you?

Moving on from my rambles... I have to say that I've become a working vacation connoisseur over this past year. A significant part of my job involves traveling around the country (and world) networking, giving presentations, and fundraising. I also spend a significant amount of time doing online research and sending emails, which can be done from pretty much anywhere. I'm currently based in Philadelphia, but I am originally from southern California and still have a lot of contacts there, as well as family and friends. Since fundraising is not geographically restricted, I have been able to travel a significant amount with my job. In fact, I'm just reaching the conclusion of my 4th California visit of the year.

The initial reason for returning to my homeland most recently (other than the sunshine) is that two high school friends were getting married, and I was asked to be a bridesmaid in both of their wedding. Since I knew that I'd be coming out anyway, I took it upon myself to set up as many meetings/presentations/networking opportunities as possible during my time on the west coast, and succeeded in prolonging my trip to 2 1/2 weeks. I was able to stay with friends and family the entire time, and since I don't have an office out here, my working space took a variety of forms, depending on my location. However, my absolute favorite work space is beside the pool (pictured above). During the first week of this trip, the weather was sunny and hot, so I spent several hours each day sweating by the pool to the sound of the keyboard as I worked on a business plan, marketing materials, and emails. There's nothing like working on business documents and a tan simultaneously.

All that being said, I've changed my perception of a working vacation from a falsely-advertised hiatus from responsibility to a unique opportunity to capitalize on travels and to take advantage of the random opportunities to visit family and friends while also handling business. It can be challenging to maintain a consistent work ethic and schedule when I'm out of the typical work environment, but with a little self-motivation, I've learned how to balance work with pleasure, and now thoroughly enjoy the freedom and excitement that working vacations provide!

Recent Artwork

I've always been interested in various forms of artistic expression (drawing, painting, sewing, photography), but haven't invested much time into cultivating my skills. However, as of late, I have had the urge to explore my creative side. So, I've taken it upon myself to do a number of paintings and other "crafty" projects for the house. Here's one of my recent projects, which now hangs above the fireplace in the living room.



This is half of the 2-canvas project. I wanted to use birds as my theme, and was using a number of different pictures as inspiration for mine.



This is the other half of my project.



And this is what they look like together. Before I started the project, I knew that I wanted to have a continuous picture over the 2 canvases. I love vibrant colors, so I thought I definitely went for the bold look. I ran into an issue of the bird on the blue canvas not standing out enough from the background, so I decided to add a lighter oolor behind, which immediately looked like a moon. What started out as merely two different colored backgrounds came to represent "night and day." The birds' names are Winston and Harriet.

What I'm NOT Looking for in a Guy

It seems to be a common occurrence for single ladies to make a list of what they're looking for in a guy. It may only be a mental list, but the list still exists. Makes sense. I think it's extremely important to know what you want beforehand. In my experience, this aids in the whole "shopping" process. I have a list, and in fact, it's a rather lengthy one. It started out as general ideas, but over the years, I've amended, restructured, and re-prioritized my list. As I get older, I realize that I don't want the same things in a guy that I did 5 years ago, and I'm sure I'll feel the same way 5 years from now. Rather than make a list of "Mr. Perfect," who, by the way, DOES NOT EXIST (this is a topic for another blog post), I decided to make a list of some of the things that I definitely do not want in a guy. Here goes.

What I'm not looking for in a guy:

A boy
Let me begin this list by saying that as I progress along in my 20s (I know I'm only 23, but that's a lot older than 19), I have realized more and more that guys do not seem to progress in maturity the way girls do. Stereotype? Yes. Reality? In most cases. As my interests have evolved from weekend mall shopping trips to dinner and a glass of wine with friends, I have found that many guys are still interested in the equivalent of the shopping trip. This brings me to the next thing on my list, which is:

A boy who loves video games
If your idea of a good time is sitting in front of the television and living in a virtual world for hours upon end, then you have some growing up to do, and I'm really not interested in your company. What boggles my mind is that so many guys spend countless hours playing sports with their thumbs, when they are fully capable of engaging in healthy physical activities in real life. Even worse than the sports are the fantasy worlds in which wizards fight dragons and communicate in unintelligible languages. Really? I mean, really? If you invested as much time in reality as you do in fantasy land, you'd probably be a decent date. But for now, I'll pass.

A boy who loves video games and lives at home
Let me preface this statement by saying that I totally understand when situations do now allow for financial independence, and the smart thing to do is to live at home until you can afford to move out. Absolutely fine. However, there comes a time when enough is enough. So you're 26 and your mom still does your laundry. Cute. Oh, and she makes you and your friends snacks when they come over to play video games? Gag me. The issue with this scenario is complacency and inability/refusal to strive for something more. If you tell me that you still live at home, you better show me a 10-step action plan for how you are working your way to maturity and independence.

A boy who loves video games, lives at home and is into himself
One of the things that most repulses me about a guy is when he's into himself. I don't care if you're the most attractive guy in the world. Conceit is never flattering. There's a huge difference between having healthy self-confidence and being arrogant. One is attractive, the other is not. And you can always tell who these guys are. They're the ones who walk around with their Polo shirt collars popped and their Armani shades resting on the bridge of their nose. They have this air about them that screams "Check me out. I'm cool." Well, I hate to burst your bubble, but not only am I unimpressed with your not-so-subtle tactics, but your arrogance will be the topic of my jokes for the day.

A boy who loves video games, lives at home, is into himself and doesn't dress well
If you meet all of these criteria, you're a real winner! In my opinion, one of the signs of maturity, responsibility and success is learning how to dress yourself appropriately, no matter the occasion. I'm not asking you to spend thousands of dollars on a wardrobe. What I am asking is for you not to wear pajamas out in public. Ever. And if I catch you wearing the same outfit three days in a row, that's a no go. My favorite is having multiple pairs of the same pants and wearing them every single day. Seriously? Are you so unimaginative that you can't have any variance in color or style? That's boring and makes you look like a slob who lacks in self-esteem. Brutal, but honest. So, wear grungy jeans and an old t-shirt when you're changing the oil, but not when you're going out. I'm not advocating tuxes on a daily basis, but I think it's important to consider your environment and audience when dressing yourself in the morning.

So, I'm sure there are plenty of other things that I could add to this list, but it's getting late and you're probably tired of reading this novel. This is simply something that I've been thinking about as of late and thought I'd share. Guys (if there are any guys who actually take the time to get through this), sorry if it was a bit harsh. It was unintentional (mostly), and if you found yourself associating with my list, use this as constructive criticism and "man up!"

How to Spend 6 Days in Scandinavia for $200

I recently returned from a trip to Scandinavia, where I spent three days in Stockholm and three days in Copenhagen, all for only $200. You may be asking yourself how this is possible, since Scandinavian countries are the most expensive in the world, and you can't even spend that little visiting a city here in the US. Well, I'm here to tell you that it IS possible, and that I had a fabulous time on a dime. I'll break it down according to my costs:

Lodging
This is where I saved the most money. In fact, my lodging was free. FREE! I found this amazing website called globalfreeloaders.com, which is basically a network of people all over the world who open up their home to travelers. It's free to sign up, and all you have to do is type in the city you're visiting and then dates you'll be there, and a list of people in that city who are on the network pops up. There's a description for each member, and you basically choose who you'd like to stay with and email them to ask if they'd be willing to host you. So, I found a host for both Stockholm and Copenhagen, which ended up being a good cultural experience.

Transportation
In both Stockholm and Copenhagen, I bought 72 hour transportation cards, which basically gets you on any train, bus or metro in the city for free. I paid about $30 each, but it's way cheaper to do it this way than to pay for each individual train/bus ride you take. I suppose if you stay in the middle of downtown, you wouldn't necessarily need to take transportation at all (except to the airport). But I thought they were great to have. As a side note, the public transportation systems in Sweden and Denmark are fantastic (as they are throughout the majority of western Europe). As a second side note, bikes are SUPER popular in both cities, so you might want to rent one. They're actually free in Copenhagen. All you do is leave a small deposit, which you get back when you return the bike.

Food
Food and drinks are fairly expensive in Scandinavia. Most things there are at least double the price you would pay here in the States. You're going to spend at least $25-$30 for a sit down meal, and much more than that at the nicer restaurants. It's definitely possible to find affordable places to eat, but they are few and far between. For this reason, I didn't eat out. I brought granola bars and beef jerkey with me from home, which were great snacks for my travels. In both cities, I went to the grocery store and bough bread, cheese (the cheese there is delicious!) and pears. Between all of those things, I was good to go. If you're into fine dining, then you wouldn't want to take this approach, but I wasn't there for the food, so it worked out fine for me. The tap water there is super safe to drink, so I just filled up my water bottle different places I visited. I broke down and purchased a banana nutella crepe in Copenhagen, which ended up being a marvelous idea. I probably spent about $20 for food in both cities.

Entertainment/Tourism
My ideas of sightseeing is walking around and seeing the sights (makes sense, right?). So I did A LOT of walking. I would estimate about 8-9 hours of walking each day. Of course there were intervals of short breaks, but I was constantly on the go. The great thing about walking is that it's free, and it allows you to see things that you would most likely miss if you relied solely on public transportation to get around. There were tons of fabulous things to see- great architecture, beautiful parks, amazing sunsets... All of these things were free. However, I did allocate some spending money for visiting select places. In Stockholm, I paid to take a tour of City Hall and to climb the tower at City Hall, which offers a breathtaking view of the city. I also paid to take a tour of both palaces-the one where the King works and the one where the royal family lives. All three of these were TOTALLY worth paying to see. I think the three of those cost me between $30-$40. In Copenhagen, I paid to visit the old castle, which was pretty small but also totally worth seeing. The royal jewels were available for viewing as part of the tour. I also paid to climb a church tower for a view of the city. I think I spent about $20 between those two. I still have my student ID from college, and I put it to good use. The prices I paid were all student prices. Had I paid normal admission, it would have been at least twice the cost. A little dishonest? Yes. But, I figured if I still look young enough to pass as a college student, great. Plus, I'm fairly sure that neither Sweden nor Denmark are in need of my money.

Souvenirs
I bought a few magnets and some post cards to send home to the family, but that's it. I think of the hundreds of pictures that I took as souvenirs, so I really didn't feel the need to purchase t-shirts or small figurines. I think I spent about $15 in total.

So, if you add up all of those costs (give or take a few bucks), I ended up spending around $200 for six days of sightseeing. I must say, I'm quite impressed with myself. Granted, not everyone would enjoy the kind of traveling that I do, but it works for me. I had a fabulous time, and highly recommend both cities to everyone!

What 5' 2" Gets You

We ran out of creamer at the office today, and I knew I would be needing a second cup of coffee in the afternoon, so I decided to swing by the grocery store during my lunch break and pick some up. Generally, we get the regular creamer. But not today. I walked to the refrigerator section of the store and found what I was looking for. It was on the top shelf, and there were only two left, which means they were all the way in the back. Despite standing on my tip toes in my 2 inch heels, there was no way I was going to reach the back. I very briefly considered climbing onto the first shelf for a boost, but came to my senses and realized that I'm 23 years old and really shouldn't be doing things like that anymore. Then I glanced around to see if there were any tall shoppers around who would be willing to help a shorty out, but there was no one in sight. So I grabbed the fat-free version, which was one shelf lower and within my reach. No big deal, and it's clearly the healthier option. I just found it interesting that my options were automatically limited due to my height.

Kid on a Leash

So I decided to go on an adventure to Valley Forge this weekend, and as I was walking around, I saw a situation that made me chuckle. There was a typical American family- the dad, the mom, the child and the dog. I could tell they were from Boston by their accents. Nothing too abnormal about that. But then I took a second look, and I discovered that the dad was walking the dog, and the mom was walking the kid. Both on leashes. Hilarious! Of course this isn't the first time that I've seen a child on a leash, but I have to laugh out loud every time I have the pleasure of experiencing this phenomenon. I understand the reasoning behind the decision to put your kid on a leash, but I certainly don't agree with it. If you can't control your child enough to have them walk next to you, then there's either something wrong with your child or something wrong with your parenting skills. Children need to learn self-restraint rather than being physically restrained like a dog. Funny? Yes. But not something I will do if I ever have children.

Lazy Saturday Afternoon

It is a very rare experience when I find myself with an entirely free day. No obligations, no specific plans, nothing holding me down or back. Today is one of those days, and it has been FANTASTIC so far. Interestingly enough, I always feel the need to set my alarm, even if there is absolutely no reason for me to be up at a reasonable hour. I inevitably end up pressing snooze multiple times, which defies the purpose of setting my alarm in the first place... Oh the things I do merely for the sake of doing them. Despite my slightly late start this morning, I've been on a mission to get a lot accomplished. While most people think of weekends as a time to sit on the couch and watch television, I consider the fact that the weekends are really the only time I have to do anything other than work, which makes me want to take advantage of them and accomplish as many "non-work" tasks as possible. Ironically, I usually do a significant amount of house work, but I actually find it to be relaxing. Or at least I find that I can relax much more in a clean house than in a dirty one. So after thoroughly cleaning my car, both inside and out, and cleaning up a bit around the house, I decided to practice the discipline of relaxation by laying out in the backyard and drawing. The way I see it, although laying out is a rather lazy thing to do, I was simultaneously working on my tan and exploring my artistic side. Multitasking during a lazy activity makes me feel much more accomplished. I ended up having a lengthy phone conversation with a friend, which means I didn't get any drawing done. But now that I'm back in the clean (and ever so relaxing) house, it's time to get started on my next masterpiece. I'm fully enjoying the lack of obligations and activities of the day, and am beginning to think that there may be some merit in succumbing to laziness every once in a while.

Recent Ponderings

Over the years, I have discovered that my deepest and most spiritual moments have taken place in nature. Whether I'm hiking through the alps, searching for sand dollars on the beach or laying in a field staring up at the stars, I experience an indescribable sense of peace- a connection with both creation and creator. Despite my constant doubts, the times when my faith seems to fail me and I question the purpose behind life itself, I cannot ignore the feeling that there is so much more than what meets the eye. Beyond the physical realm, there must exist a more powerful force or being that gives order to the chaos and reason to the inexplicable. Regardless of the scientific arguments and political rhetoric that claim to explain life as a mere series of random events, I believe without reservation that there is a level of divinity that exists beyond human comprehension. One can take a relativist stance, but if there is indeed a supreme being who rules over the universe, it seems to me that [His] existence and sovereignty are an absolute truth, regardless of one's personal perception and experience. If a blind man argues that the sky is green, does that make the sky green? My point with all of this (if I have one) is that creation itself speaks of a creator, and if there is a creator, is [He] not creator, and therefore Lord of all?

I'd love to hear your thoughts, as I by no means have this figured out.